but regard ye tales of damsels eh knights be daring deeds eh ye flights in tights be robin no wood,s merry ye men  ye rumours abound be cursed eh muttered be drinketh ye ale be talketh ye tale be cavernous arm,s "ye bottom be buttered" be ribauld ye rage or ye sometimes be sage be "better than" maudlin ye sorrows be drowned   or ye laughter regales be ye beach balleen whales ye pester be fester ye jester  be clowned   but heareth ye tale be sir styeth did fail be ye little red riding,s big bad invation not be,eth yeh choice and he neheth rejoice but all hear ye be coronation but ye mocketh remain be "oui je la t,aime" some sayeth true love not be true and he be ye regal number one perchance ye regal number two be ye soft be ye strong be ye very very long be breaketh wind be splash be flush as some still regale "ye olde slappers tale" ye audience wait be baited hush but remember ye rhymes be ye flea bitten timess . . . . ye plaque ridden corpses be rattus be rotton,s till rejoice be ye well as we all hear ye tale be fairytale princess "simona of bottoms" and first ye buy ye plates be mugs until hear tale of crash eh cuss "ascendeth ye throne be ye laughing gnome cause ye be ye fuckwit resplendicus" but who be ye sty eh who be ye sly as ye executioner roll ye craps" and all ye french fries on ye side  eh sauce be "K.C.Chickenflaps" but who be ye sty who be ye sly ye pray fair axeman be one chop of coin camp but who be yeh trusty arise sir burrell  ( be greedy gaylord of well be ye camp camp ) some sayeth yeh rock but ye just loveth cock ye lady igrayne but yeh drawbridge be raised but hot buttered cob,s and nobs be gobs come "praise be  my soul" and ye songs ye be praised" but receive ye robes be righteousness ye "tamptestry-on-de-vickers" "hualley-luy-le-ah" be song .... nut hark ye sound be furtive snickers cause hear ye tales be ye furtive regales ye cat got yet creme eh ye pussycat mews perchance not be ye "daily regaily" but ye "sunday courts" eh ye "news of ye pews" be careless talk midst peasants ye walk midst yeh sloven idolatry dives some sayeth be nayeth not"my king a ling" but ye pages be stucketh be "regales wives"   be slovenly cooker be old porkfest looker ye fairest but ye be,eth sure  be yeh lovely personality ask "ye meteor dodging dinosaur" but ye prince be plonkered of chardony conquered  ye bitches be tripping be bunny raps and all yeh french fries on ye side eh sauce be "K.C.Chickenflaps"
	but all,s not well be yee "tight shorts" tale ( yee fridge no work ) be jestering slop maximutterus ruleth ye roost eh ye dodgy old posho,s be getteth yee chop eh yee glockenspeil toll,s be yee troll,s low low be poll,s yee peasant,s be revolteth eh how "ye sleazy old slags be cheap plastic bag,s that we neyh wanteth we neyh wanteth now" but sir larry leecheth be papa neyh preacheth yee lady madonna be so true blue eh ribauld quip,s mean norvigicus ship,s tales of yee beach balleen whaling crew eh flappeth be clappeth ( ye mucky mag happeth ) yee trappeth backslappeth be ale till dark "wacky races" be scarywell cases .... and ye endeth be bendeth be over in jail as ye stiffling wind blow be ye "cinema show" ye one eyed be rippled applause yee rum chum be suppeth be real ale yee cuppeth yee creaketh be good ship guffaws eh ye amber by night be angeleth delight ?? ye bannana surpriseth rot,s green some say  la folie be jestering jolly ..... yee quivering drapeth be dream but who be "seeing out ye angel" who be yee "toiler on ye sea" who,s sailors pipe be vivian,s gripe ....  who dunketh ye rich tea but yee punketh be poseth ye one o,clock closeth ye quick fit fitter be rabbeth be sister wendy masterpiece ( eh ye sunday be so sabbath ) eh yee festereth oven be so flaps ( simoana,s lambs they be screaming ) but "ye leg,s they be spreadeth apart again" eh "whatever love be meaning" cause ye groupie be fawning ye lady be yawning yee "follow yee be follow me" yee rumour cross ye troubled land  eh cross ye seventh sea cause ye good duke be yorketh yee piggy ye porketh ...... yee "flocketh of seagulls" be fly but who be saileth victorious .... be just yee "jealous sty" eh who be guffaw,s as he josephine,s draw,s .... neyh be  tonighteth ye lughter a means to an end that not yet endeth "slappily ever after" ???
	b
	but in sheeptown maggot they know who.s the faggot the pedo crawled over them all as the jester pester now started to fester ... the bluebottle crawled up the wall but it.s high flying eagles for smeagols regals it,s chantelle my belle then maybe another as the sunshine goes down for the camden clown  (  we all know how josephine crept round his mother ) and we all know the turkey who,d vote for xmas  a hot roast thats all going down and how he dreams of a tight shorts xmas .. .. . and of santa clause coming to town so simpering slackers for cheap clapped out crackers . . ( or maybe the new queen of phwoar ) as the nosey old  parkers still leer for koo stakers ... how lady di once flashed  the lashes demure but we all know rolf harris got plastered in paris ...  as he drove around in a wandering car as the wise old men they still all ask when .. and it,s twinkle twinkle little star