and daves turgid canker
a little bitch fuck but who,s losing the plot
as the hideous hag shares her no 5 fag
and her fentalyn fares down in kensington rot
as the no 1 single at "jingle and mingle" ....
now thats what i call a lockdown party
elemetary it,s said but they still fear the tread
the "behind you" that echoes down time . , , moriaty
and the luvvies lost soul . . . . as he nails his last role ....
in the dark fetid one bulb .. . . of stairwell des res
"tis the jungles dark lore . . . neyh .festerering shore ....
but alas tis" . . . simple suella says
but hansy pansy ran away
were the three little piggys such good chums
was the big bad wolf so really gay
as limp as a "duckybilledduckyplus " a wailing whale but a one plus ten
did the small hand point to the laghing gnome did the big hand points to the flowerpot men
cause you can,t be too sure of manly galore and you can,t be sure of shell
watch the trolly dolly flounces around but all,s not gel that doesn,t hair gel
a limp wrist falcetto but jusy one cornetto as the heat reigns down in italy
and he won,t want to go to hawaii dive oh or ride into "greasy-on-flaps-by-the sea"
but on stoke fruit farm it,s the simpering charm
the little riding of risible rotters
it,s basketcase ball and we bet on the fall
and the coming soon of the "balleen beach trotters"
in the basement bar of the pissed
but we all heard the tale of the ship that set sail
and the sunshine thats never been kissed
and the monks bad habits for rachaels rabbits ... that really wasnt cricket
but caught in the lair of the strawberry fare ... legover but no middle wicket
but the patter to flatter as the joke teeth still chatter .... but it,s just all so taurus the bull
rocks stars in bars but who sang life on mars ... but harp still stays sharp on the pull
but the spandau ballletic are friends just electric ... is that just a short flight of stairs
and such a shame about the face ... in his leaque against cruel hippy flairs
cause it,s said the ladys not for turning ... she, not a buy one get one free
but did rudolph the red nosed reindeers cartoon .... really air on i.t.v
but some girls do and some girls don,t .... but the wizard saw "my baby jive"
but who,s selling england by the pound .... and who just had a go on the m25
cause some might say that it,s pay and display .... and the rumours abound of the thousand quips
but it,s just a sausage and greasy cone ... a cone of very greasy chips
but the "never for ever" the "reprise" of heather
the "greatest hits" of the princess has been
as sergeant pepper made his stand
but simon only shoot blanks at the queen
no horse and carriagen no three in that marriage . . . a dunking disappointment
just a short trip by car to the drab registrar . . . regality decried
as the band struck up with "ride around sally ride sally ride"
cause it,s said she had an "earthy something" and wasn,t afraid to flout it
alice and edward were lovers you know .... o.k. yah so how about it
but all.s not well in the fairytale . . . but then the air turned royal blue
"oh camilla do i fill you uo" . . . . "oh yes oh yes you do"
but a showmance to chance but he still did the dance come sleazy conniving old slapper
get caught on the diddle you play second fiddle to mr and mrs crapper
but a title thats yours to that regal applause ... regal therein autographing
"her royal hideousness her shagness of carnal"
to the sound of the hyena laughing
